Sunday, July 26, 2009


Pictured Above: Actual crime scene (not a re-enactment or dramatization)

The incoming tenant hired local movers to bring her belongings to our house today in preparation for her Aug. 1 move-in. All was going well until one of the movers suddenly inquired with The Boy about the possibility of using our loo. I sensed a familiar urgency in the man's voice, and knew right then that he was going to disrespect our bathroom.

Minutes passed into quarter hours as he rather loudly labored away, and I made a mental note to assign TB to Hazmat duty upon our visitors' departure. Acknowledging that this was indeed his fault, TB graciously agreed, and though he did not find 'redrum' smeared all over the walls in human feces like I had imagined he would, he did find my freshly-laundered bath towel balled up against the floor register with a single piece of unused Kleenex jammed between the two.

Yes, gentle reader, it would appear that a stranger not only used my towel, but cast it to the well-trodden ground in a vain attempt to ABSORB THE WRETCHED STENCH OF HIS EXCREMENT so that it wouldn't make its way through the vent and into the basement where his colleagues were working.

Now, I ask you: Is there no greater injustice?